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meatpuppet

Favorite Simpsons quotes

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"You hate your father, don't you?"
"Sometimes, but the guy I really hate is your father!"

 

"I've got to, honey. I owe it to old Red, as both his friend and his killer."

 

"Thanks everyone! I'm all better now. No more storing up the anger till I explode. If any of you does something I don't like, you're gonna hear about it! Alright? ... And if you really tick me off? I'm gonna run you down with my car."

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2 hours ago, Nulla Lex Ink. said:

 

"Thanks everyone! I'm all better now. No more storing up the anger till I explode. If any of you does something I don't like, you're gonna hear about it! Alright? (Slow clap) ... And if you really tick me off? I'm gonna run you down with my car." (Much slower clap)

 

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"At school my boobs were bigger than all my friends' and I was afraid to show them. Now, I feel they make my outfits look better. They're like an accessory. " - Jessica

"The day you take complete responsibility for yourself, the day you stop making any excuses, that's the day you start to the top." - OJ
 

"I think there's a difference between ditzy and dumb. Dumb is just not knowing. Ditzy is having the courage to ask!" - Jessica


"I could not tell you the date of my mother's death. I could not tell you the date of my dad's death. These are not dates that I find significant." - OJ
 
"Is this chicken, what I have, or is this fish? I know it's tuna, but it… it says 'Chicken... by the Sea'." - Jessica

"I had one fight in my adult life. I had the famous '89 fight with Nicole, which she admits that she initiated the physical part." - OJ

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Oh man, this one is just too perfect.

 

I like being a teacher in Japan cause it suits my lazy, leisurely lifestyle like a velvet glove.

 

I'm a 40 year old man that gets a month off for summer, like a damn kid.  It's amazing.  So I still get that same excitement on the last day of school and belt out the Alice Cooper song as I leave.  And I love this scene where the kids can't wait to get out and school but they learn ONE final lesson:

 

 

I absolutely love the episode "Bart of Darkness" where it's the start of a hot, hot summer.  This one is relevant cause of the heat wave we are all currently experiencing.   So the Simpsons get a pool.  But Bart breaks his leg so he misses the summer.

 

My older brother was in California with his family 2 weeks ago and they were at a Trampoline play park and my bro managed to break his foot.  He was a good sport and finished out the vacation on crutches but that meant a re-break and set when he got back to Ohio.

 

So now he's laid up at home with a broken foot and weird pressure cuffs to ward off blot clots, totally immobile.

 

If I were there, I'd write this on his cast.   I'm still gonna send him the pic.

 

TTeXjOR.jpg

 

That cracks me up every damn time.   "Milpool."  Brilliant.

Edited by EstrangedTWAT

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Milhouse:  "Bart, remember when I was crying at recess?  I think I'm finally ready to tell you why."

 

 

I don't know why, but I just remembered this Milhouse quote and it cracked me the hell up.

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I absolutely LOVE ol' Grimey.

 

He is the spitting image of my older brother, in both looks and mannerisms.  If my brother ever guest starred on the Simpsons, they'd have to use Grimey's character model.   I convinced him to use Grimey as his avatar for all social media and it's so perfect cause it looks just like him.

 

Yep.   Good ol' Grimey.

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"Underachiever and proud of it man." That t-shirt proved to be emblematic of how I've tried to live my life. You gotta walk before they make you run.

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Willie has some of my favorite lines:

 

Grease me up woman!

 

You just made an enemy for life

 

Ya used me skinner...YA USED ME! 

 

I also love when Edna Krabapple showed the bunny tape about sex and she tell the class "She's faking it" lol

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